


phosphenes and other ways to see the world

by heereandqueere



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz (Two River Cast) RPF, Be More Chill - Ned Vizinni
Genre: Accidents, Alternate Universe - Blind, Car Accident, Fluff, Gay, M/M, Sad, Smut, bmc, boyf riends - Freeform, ok jeremy’s like legally blind, probably some smut uwu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-06-14 20:06:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15396414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heereandqueere/pseuds/heereandqueere
Summary: “The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision.”“Michael, have you ever poured out your cereal, then gone to grab milk from the fridge and realized you’re out? That’s way worse than being blind.”Alternative Summary - Jeremy’s been legally blind since he was seven.





	1. Chapter 1

Dr. Peterson patted Jeremy’s shoulder lightly, rounding the exam chair and shooting Michael a sad look. The expression slightly dampened his mood, but he tried not to let it affect him too much. 

“How am I doing?” Jeremy asked hopefully as Dr. Peterson tapped away at his computer’s keyboard, updating Jeremy’s patient profile. Michael squeezed Jeremy’s hand supportively, trying not to give away the inevitable news that they’d be receiving yet again, just like every other month. 

Not great. 

“Well, the good news is that it hasn’t gotten worse,” Dr. Peterson informed the two with a reassuring smile, shifting his gaze from Jeremy to Michael. “Hasn’t gotten better either, though.” Jeremy sighed quietly and ran his thumb along Michael’s knuckle. Michael knew that they had been hoping that Jeremy’s new medication would help with his eyesight, but apparently they had been a bit too hopeful.

Michael looked up at Jeremy as he slouched back against his seat, staring blankly in the doctor’s general direction. “That’s good, I guess,” Jeremy finally said, never letting go of Michael’s hand. Michael couldn’t help but smile. Jeremy was just so patient and understanding and optimistic, his eager spirit contagious. “There’s always next month.” Michael chuckled and looked back up at Dr. Peterson, who looked doubtful but lightly amused. He’d been by Jeremy’s side ever since the accident, so he knew Jeremy was always a bit too hopeful about things getting better.

Every month, Jeremy asked the exact same question, and every month, he got the exact same answer. 

“Of course,” Dr. Peterson commented nonchalantly, twisting in his chair a bit. He directed his attention to Michael, raising his eyebrows. “Have you two been looking into the corrective surgery? I know that it’s still in its wake, but I firmly believe that it could improve his eyesight.”

Michael sighed to himself and felt Jeremy’s grip on his hand tighten. Yeah, they had been thinking about it. In fact, it was all they had been thinking about. Jeremy was literally over the moon about the surgery, because any opportunity to fix his eyes was an opportunity that he was willing to look into. “Yeah,” Michael told Dr. Peterson, crossing his legs. “We have. Jeremy’s, uh, pretty happy about the possibility still, but we just don’t have the money right now.” God, had they been saving up.

Two years earlier, when Dr. Peterson had first mentioned the research that ophthalmologists had been conducting concerning corrective surgery for legal blindness caused by brain damage, Jeremy and Michael had immediately started saving up for the surgery. They budgeted, they moved into a cheaper apartment, Michael set up a sort of savings plan with Jeremy’s dad... They did everything they could to get the wheels turning, and two years later, they were still making slow but steady progress. Sure, they were still a few thousand dollars short, but that was a lot closer than they were at one point. 

Dr. Peterson nodded understandingly, turning around to pick up his clipboard. He spun back around and leaned the board against his leg, looking at Michael with a supportive expression playing across his face. “Right. You’re making progress, though, I’m sure. Jeremy’s lucky to have such a wonderful support network,” he pointed out, and Jeremy nodded frantically, his head moving so that he was facing Michael. 

Michael looked up at him and smiled, even though he couldn't really see him all that well. “I really am, aren’t I?” Jeremy furthered, then let go of Michael’s hand. He slid out of his chair cautiously, one hand on an armrest, the other on the leather of the seat. His feet found stability in the ground, and he steadied himself before placing a hand on Michael’s shoulder. Michael grabbed his hand and stood up, then Dr. Peterson hoisted himself out of his chair and closed the distance between himself and the pair. “Keep it up, boys,” he empowered them, and that was how every appointment ended. 

Michael had to admit that Jeremy’s impairment could be a living hell at times. He had been so bright and positive about the whole thing for the past seventeen years, but understandably, it got frustrating for him. Some days were worse than others, but Jeremy always tried to see the bright side of things. 

“We will. We’re getting really close to that surgery,” Jeremy promised, and Michael smiled down at him. God, he was so cute, just a ray of fucking sunshine. 

Dr. Peterson hummed contently and motioned to the door, leading Michael and Jeremy out. Michael held Jeremy close as he made sure that Jeremy didn’t bump into anything.

Michael knew that they were lucky, especially since Jeremy wasn’t  _completely_ blind. Instead, according to him and the doctors, he could only make out blobs of colors. He could tell when it was light, when it was dark, where bigger objects were, when people entered his line of vision, things like that. However, he couldn’t make out any details, which Michael couldn’t even fathom. That being said, Michael’s favorite thing in the entire world was describing things to Jeremy when he asked him to. 

_“Michael,” Jeremy hummed, hands resting gently on a pot of flowers at Lowe’s. Michael turned around and found Jeremy moving his face around above the pot in search of the plant, trying to get a whiff. He chuckled to himself and joined Jeremy, guiding his boyfriend’s chin towards the flowers. He breathed in deeply and sighed, smiling widely. “Michael, tell me what they look like.”_

_Michael let my gaze shift from Jeremy’s face to the pot, a short, ugly shrub-looking flower sprouting from the soil. He would tell Jeremy the truth about how goddamn ugly this flower was, but he just seemed so intrigued. “It’s a hydrangea,” Michael lied softly, kissing Jeremy’s cheek. “It’s the most gorgeous, vibrant hue of purple you could imagine, and... it has little flowers all over its bright green stems.” Jeremy’s smile never faltered, but he turned his head to look at Michael and furrowed his brows slightly._

_“It’s ugly, isn’t it?”_

_“Yeah, it’s really ugly.”_

Dr. Peterson walked behind the front desk as Jeremy and Michel rounded the front of it to confirm an appointment for next month with Betty, the lady who worked at the front desk. “Exactly a month from now would be the sixteenth of May. I have an opening at two. Does that work for you?” she asked the couple, looking from Jeremy to Michael. Michael nodded and sighed, watching as Dr. Peterson printed out a receipt or something. God, Michael hated being an adult. 

“We’ll put it on your account,” Dr. Peterson told Michael, handing him some papers. “Let me know if anything changes between now and next month, alright?”

”Of course,” Michael replied without hesitating, tucking the papers under his arm and giving the doctor a smile. “See you then.” Michael turned Jeremy around and led him out the door, back to the parking lot and to Michael’s car. He helped Jeremy into his seat as usual before clambering into his own own, starting the car. 

Jeremy patted the back of his seat until he found the seatbelt, then pulled it over his chest and stabbed blindly at the buckle. Michael let Jeremy struggle as he strapped himself in, used to letting Jeremy do his own thing when he wanted to.

For a widely dependent demographic, Jeremy was pretty independent for a blind person. 

He enjoyed doing things by himself, especially simple tasks like buckling himself into the car. Jeremy liked helping Michael bring groceries into the house, as well as tying his own shoes and making their bed every morning. Of course it’d never been done right, but hell if Michael had the heart to tell him. 

“I _really_ want fucking _KFC_ right now,” Jeremy whined, seatbelt in place and fingers tapping against his knees. Michael snorted as he pulled the car out of park and backed out of the parking spot. “What do you want from _KFC_ that we don’t have at home?” Michael asked, to which Jeremy guffawed and shifted his head to look at Michael in surprise. “Really? What, we have, like, three boxes of cereal, which is literally just the dust now, some leftover spaghetti, half a container of orange chicken from the other night, and probably some _Sprite_. What do you mean, ‘ _What do you want from_ KFC _that we don’t have at home?_ ’”

Michael chuckled lightly, rolling his eyes. God, Jeremy was so stubborn. “Fine,” Michael interjected before Jeremy could scold him further, driving past the street that he’d usually turn down to return back to the complex. “What’re you doing for lunch tomorrow?” 

Jeremy clicked his tongue and shrugged, hand wandering to the center console. He almost missed it, and Michael was sure that the interior of his car just looked like a gray mess to Jeremy. Michael took Jeremy's hand and continued driving, waiting for his response. “I guess I’ll take the spaghetti, since you’re a big baby and don’t like leftovers,” he teased, and Michael gasped in mock offense.

“Rude, leftovers can suck my dick.” 

“Didn’t realize I had changed my name to ‘leftovers,’ but not in the car,” Jeremy countered, turning his head towards the window to his right. Michael giggled and looked back at the road, spotting _KFC_ just a few buildings away. 

He slowed down and put on his blinker, and Jeremy swayed against the direction Michael pulled the car in. “You’re gonna be okay for work tomorrow?” Michael confirmed, eyes wandering to Jeremy’s smiling face. Jeremy looked back at Michael and drew his lips into a thin line. “I’m a high school drama teacher, not a rocket scientist,” he cooed, tapping Michael’s hand with his finger. “Besides, the kids think I’m _cool_. Hard to imagine your boyfriend being cooler than you, Mell, but even with my lack of vision, my coolness? It tops yours.” 

With a blown raspberry, Michael pulled behind a car waiting in the drive-thru. “Uh, first of all, bull crap,” he pointed out, holding up a finger. He held up another one. “Second, being able to see doesn’t give me an advantage. I’m just cooler than you, admit it.” 

“Cool people don’t put their toothpaste on their brush and then wet it, dork,” Jeremy laughed at Michael, shaking his head. “Besides, you don’t like _KFC_ ’s biscuits, so I don’t even know why I’m talking to you right now.” He crossed his arms and looked away shamefully, and Michael pretended to start crying. “I don’t deserve this kind of emotional abuse,” he pouted, sniffling. The car in front of them pulled up, so Michael brought his foot up off the brake and pulled forward after the car. 

Jeremy just shrugged carelessly. “Too bad,” he replied, clucking. “Unless you take it back, you’re just not as cool as me. Suck it up.” 

Michael loved Jeremy with all his heart, but Jeremy’s twisted opinions on “good food” and Michael’s obviously superior state of coolness made him wonder why and how we’ve been dating for so long. He guessed that love was a mystery that he’d never be able to understand. 


	2. Chapter 2

“What’re you wearing?” Jeremy asked Michael, who was a moving red blob crossing the room. He asked the same question every night before bed, as well as every morning before his boyfriend left the house. He just liked to know so that he could have a picture of Michael in his head. 

Hell, he hadn’t seen him since he was seven, anyways. Michael could probably have huge teeth and a unibrow by now for all he knew. 

Michael hummed quietly and looked down at his pajama sweater and boxers. “Looks like the white and red striped sweater and white underwear,” he told Jeremy, readjusting the elastic band of his boxers as he grabbed some pajamas for Jeremy. At twenty-four, Jeremy had had plenty of time to learn how to use the shower by himself, but he still pretended like he needed help sometimes just so that Michael would stay in the room with him. Michael tossed Jeremy some clothes, then closed the drawer and walked over to grab Jeremy’s towel, which was discarded on the ground. However, Jeremy did have _some_ decency, so he was sitting in his underwear, waiting for Michael to get clothes.  

“What am I wearing?” Jeremy asked, taking what he felt was a shirt out of his lap. He held it up in front of him, against the light from the bathroom. Black and long sleeves. 

“You’re a baby and you get cold when the temperature dips below eighty,” Michael cooed, scoffing. “Black sweater and gray sweatpants.” Jeremy frowned and slipped the sweater over his head, feeling around inside to find the sleeves. “I wanted something more colorful, Micah.” 

Michael snorted and kissed Jeremy’s cheek, holding him close. “Dork, you can’t even fucking see it,” he countered, and Jeremy shot him a determined glare. “Asshole, I’m handicapped. I’m supposed to get special treatment!” he pouted, though he believed the opposite. In fact, Jeremy never let Michael park in handicap spots, and he never limited life for Michael or himself just because he couldn’t see all that well. The notion made him nauseous. 

“Yeah, well, I’m gay, so I’m a minority. Oh, I’m also a minority, so I guess I win,” Michael argued, kissing Jeremy again before returning to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Jeremy stuck his tongue out at Michael, or in Michael’s moving direction. 

He stood up and walked to the bathroom, which wasn’t difficult if he just followed the light. Besides, they had been living in the apartment for nearly two years; he knew his way around. Michael and Jeremy kept their toothbrushes in separate cups, per Jeremy’s request, because Jeremy couldn’t tell which was which. Michael had always told him that they could just use different styles of toothbrushes, so that they felt different or something, but Jeremy said that he liked having the same type of toothbrush as Michael. Fucking weirdo.

Jeremy reached for his cup, which was a blue color against the white of the counter. He located his toothbrush with ease, then continued brushing his teeth without Michael’s assistance.

It made Jeremy laugh, how difficult people thought that his life was. He always told people that it was just like their own, that he could do almost anything a person with perfect sight could do except tell the difference between shampoo and conditioner. In fact, Jeremy never took his disability very seriously. He constantly made jokes about it and didn’t let it get in the way of anything. Literally anything. Jeremy consistently risked his health and well-being just so that he could feel like a normal person. 

_His hands were covered in burns, shaking as he stirred his “potatoes” frantically. The clock that he and Michael had bought years ago that chimed the time every hour started going off, and Jeremy was panicking. Michael was supposed to be home from work any minute, and he hadn’t even finished the side dishes._

_The kitchen timer went off, telling Jeremy that he needed to get the chicken out of the oven. Maybe it was chicken. He reached for the oven mitts, but he came up short and placed his hand on a burner that he had previously been using for something else. Jeremy screamed in shock and agony as he brought his hand to his chest, his dog Wolfie barking loudly, pressing against his left leg. “Yeah, you little shit,” Jeremy hissed, flailing his hand and blowing on it. “Too late for that, thanks.”_

_Just then, Michael’s keys could be heard fumbling with the lock, and Jeremy knew that he’d be scared and upset if he figured out that he had burnt himself by accident. With a defeated sigh, Jeremy turned around toward the direction of the door, seeing the white wall darken as Michael entered the room._

_He was probably terrified, but it’s not like Jeremy could tell._

_“Jere!” Michael screeched upon seeing him, throwing the door shut and rushing to join Jeremy in the kitchen. Jeremy stared at the wall as Michael fixed the huge mess he had made. Something was definitely burning. “Jeremy!”_

_Jeremy groaned and turned his head to face Michael, frowning. “I just wanted to make you dinner. You worked late,” he pouted, and Michael turned to look at him. He hesitated, knowing that Jeremy’s heart was in the right place, just not his optic nerves or his cooking skills. “Just, uh... You’re using a knife instead of a spatula.”_

Snapping out of his thoughts, Jeremy finished brushing his teeth, then spat into the sink. He really couldn’t ever tell if he made it or not, because the sink was white and so was the counter. If he didn’t, Michael usually cleaned up after him, which was over half the time. “Floss me up, hoe,” Jeremy instructed Michael, grinning widely. Michael looked up from his reflection and at Jeremy, who was flaunting a toothy smile. He chuckled and spat into the sink, then rinsed off his and Jeremy’s brushes, placing them in their appropriate cups. 

“Since you asked _so_ nicely,” Michael cooed, grabbing the floss from the bathroom drawer. He pulled out a length of it and wrapped it around his fingers, then moved Jeremy’s lip so that he could get the back molars. Flossing Jeremy and helping him get ready for bed were the most domestic parts of their daily routines, just because it was so intimate and physically close. Something about pushing such weird boundaries really connected them as friends and as a couple. Who else would floss their boyfriend’s teeth for him?

Jeremy hummed as he waited for Michael to finish, but Michael was a perfectionist and insisted on removing every piece of food from between Jeremy’s teeth. He didn’t want Jeremy getting a cavity or something like that, though he was more prone to them genetically speaking. 

“You look so pretty,” Jeremy murmured as Michael took the floss out of his mouth, running his tongue along his teeth. Minty. Michael snorted and threw away the string, returning to Jeremy and wrapping his arms around Jeremy’s waist. “Only for you,” he replied softly, bringing his lips to rest on Jeremy’s. He didn’t even try to argue with Jeremy when he made comments about Michael’s appearance, just because they made Jeremy feel involved and sincere. Michael pulled back and studied his boyfriend’s features as he did most of the time, just because Jeremy could tell since they were so close to each other. 

Jeremy’s eyes never bothered Michael, mainly because they had been that way for seventeen years and didn’t phase him, cloudy and shaded. In fact, high school Michael thought that Jeremy looked badass, like some video game character with a tragic backstory. 

Well, Jeremy was kind of a character with a tragic backstory, but Michael made sure that Jeremy didn’t think about his life that way. 

“Stop looking at me,” Jeremy finally broke across Michael’s train of thought, becoming self-conscious. “I’m gonna be sick, you’re too romantic for me. Gross. Gay.” Michael stuck his tongue out at Jeremy, then kissed his nose. “I stuck my tongue out at you. ‘Oowoo.’” 

Jeremy pulled away from Michael and furrowed his brow, sticking out his bottom lip. “What the fuck is an ‘oowoo?’” he demanded, and Michael chuckled to himself. “It’s that text emoticon with the _U_ , _W_ , _U_. It’s like a little sleepy face with a lil’ smile. I verbalize it since, uh, you’re fucking blind and don’t get to enjoy the viewing pleasure,” he managed, and Jeremy shoved him away, turning around.

“I’m breaking up with you.”

He reached for the doorframe and used it to guide himself back into their room, then padded to the bed and fell down onto it. Michael doubled over with laughter and followed Jeremy, placing his hands on the sides of Jeremy’s back before laying down on top of him, planting kisses along his neck. 

“You can’t break up with me, I just renewed your contract,” Michael pouted, sucking a hickey into Jeremy’s skin. The funniest part about kissing Jeremy and leaving marks was that Jeremy didn’t know that hickies left marks, or at least to what extent. Michael always left them on his neck, knowing that students and Jeremy’s co-workers would see them and wonder what the fuck Jeremy had been doing the night before. It humored him. 

Jeremy groaned loudly into the mattress, rolling over so that Michael would get off of him. “Screw off, Mell. You’re a big gay,” he teased, on his back. Michael got back up and loomed over Jeremy, a huge grin on his face. “Like what you _see_?” 

Jeremy gasped in mock offense and kicked Michael off of him, who was close to sobs with his laughter. “You’re such a fucking asshole, you dick,” he growled, sitting up and crawling cautiously to what he thought was the edge of the bed. Jeremy ran his hand across the mattress until it ran over the end of the bed, then he fell back into the bundle of blankets and crawled under. Michael watched him from his spot on the bed with a smile, on his knees. “You’re so fucking cute, you stupid head,” he praised Jeremy, his chest tightening as his adoration for his boyfriend completely overwhelmed him.

”Yeah,” Jeremy retorted sourly. “Tell me what I look like. Why am I cute?” This was basically their pre-bed routine, Jeremy asking what Michael found so attractive about him. Jesus, if Michael was still with Jeremy after so long and still dealt with his bullshit, then Jeremy must actually have been pretty attractive. 

Michael sighed happily and crawled into bed with Jeremy, snaking his arms around Jeremy’s waist under the covers and pulling him into his lap. “You have the prettiest brown hair. It’s a little curly and has a mind of its own, but it bounces when you walk and falls into your face a lot. Your skin is so pale and everything makes you blush, so it’s like you’re permanently red. You have freckles all over your nose and cheeks, plus your forehead and ears. And your chest. It’s like your Jewish God was making you and accidentally spilled an entire fucking truckload of freckles into your mixing batch.” 

Jeremy blew a raspberry and smiled. “My Jewish God? You’re such a dick,” he repeated, playfully this time. 

“You are what you eat.” 

“Keep telling me why I’m pretty so I can go to sleep, moron,” Jeremy replied, his voice whiney and tired. Michael let a breathy chuckle tickle Jeremy’s neck, then sunk his head into the crook of it. “You have such soft, pink lips. Your teeth are perfect and so straight. Four years of braces paid off, lucky for you. Uh, you have big ears, but they’re so cute and fit your face perfectly. You’re tall and may actually be a walking stick bug, but scientists can’t tell.” Jeremy elbowed him in the stomach. “Kidding. You have knobby knees and elbows with freckles all over them.” 

Jeremy started drifting off to sleep. “Has your appearance shifted drastically since your description of yourself last night?” he asked, yawning. Michael brought his hand up under Jeremy’s shirt, running it along his chest lovingly. “Nah. I got a paper cut grabbing the receipt from _KFC_ , though. I blame you.” 

“Fair enough,” Jeremy whispered, breath slowing. “I love you.” 

Michael smirked to himself and kissed Jeremy’s ear, sinking back down behind his boyfriend and melting against his warm body. “Love you more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really wanna emphasize the overall comfort in their relationship bc god u gotta be really close to a person like that don’t ya 
> 
> dunno i live for fluff and the bickering so let me just spell out their relationship for this fic so stuff can be more heartbreaking and pure


	3. Chapter 3

Michael pulled into the staff parking lot of Middle Borough High School, putting the car in park and unbuckling to help Jeremy out of the car. In the back seat, Wolfie, Jeremy’s service dog, sat up quickly and looked out the window, nose pressed against the glass. Michael slid out of the car and rounded the front, opening Jeremy’s door and grabbing his hand. 

“Any big plans for today?” Michael asked, steadying Jeremy as his foot searched for the ground. With a huff, Jeremy got out of the car, moving out of the way so that Michael could shut his door. “The kids just want to get out of school, honestly. I’m trying to let them enjoy the rest of the year without too many tests and exams, mainly because I’m sure that my TA is tired of writing them out for me,” Jeremy mused, and Michael opened the back door and let Wolfie leap out with them. He hooked up her handle and harness and handed it to Jeremy, who smiled softly and turned his head toward Michael, kissing what he thought were Michael’s lips. 

It was actually just next to them. 

“I know you know where my lips are, dork,” Michael chuckled, grabbing Jeremy’s face and bringing his lips to Jeremy’s. His boyfriend really enjoyed playing the blind card, just to humor himself, especially when it came to kissing. 

“You don’t know me. I could just be pretending to be blind, and you’d never know,” Jeremy teased, running his hand down Michael’s arm and grabbing his hand. He wished he could see Michael smiling at him, skin glowing in the morning sun. 

In all honesty, the last time Jeremy _saw_ Michael was when he was in his junior year of high school. He had gotten into some shit with some pill one of his friends had promised would restore his sight, along with boost his social status.

Jeremy never told anybody that he could see when his SQUIP was reactivated, because he’d probably seem like a liar. However, those few seconds where he had bumped into Michael in the hallway, it was like a light switch turned on in his head. The SQUIP had been actively blocking out Michael against Jeremy’s will up until that point, and that’s when Jeremy realized that he couldn’t consciously keep the SQUIP active, even if it meant that he could see perfectly fine. God, he _really_ missed being able to see, but if it meant that he could stay close with Michael, then he’d stay blind forever if he had to. 

The emotional toll the lost sight took on Jeremy was probably the worst part. When he drank the _Mountain Dew Red_ to turn the SQUIP off, he suddenly just couldn’t see anymore. Sure, he saw colors, but once he saw how things could be, with his full sight and whatnot, it was really difficult to go back to being legally blind. 

“Maybe,” Michael’s voice cut across Jeremy, thoughts, and he kissed him once more before shutting the back door and leaning down to pet Wolfie. “Have a good day, babe.” 

Jeremy hummed his reply and started walking, Wolfie pressed against his leg and leading him toward the school. Michael watched Jeremy until he got to the school’s sidewalk, then got into the car and left the school’s parking lot. 

And that’s how every morning went for Jeremy and Michael. 

———

“Well, it’s all about the character,” Jeremy told one of his students, who was asking about how Jeremy perceived acting if he couldn’t actually see. Honestly, at least one student asked the same question every day, and Jeremy gave them the same answer every day. “I listen to the voice and movements of actors and connect them to the character they’re portraying. It’s not hard.” The student sighed as they tried not to look at his eyes, which weren’t covered when he was inside. 

Jeremy never wore sunglasses unless he was outside and Michael insisted that it’d ruin his eyes. 

“Just doesn’t seem very possible,” the teenager mused, tapping their chin. “Acting is a visual thing, don’t you think?” Jeremy shrugged and moved his hand to grip the table he was sitting on, scanning the classroom. Everything was just a mess of white and brow to him, but he could tell what color everyone was wearing and who was who by the way they talked. “Of course it is,” he breathed, tapping the table. “It’s just that I can’t really, y’know, _see_ it. So I rely on my hearing, and just my knowledge of theatre. You guys ask this question every day.” 

The class laughed awkwardly, the laughter interrupted by the ringing of the bell. Jeremy listened as the sound of shuffling footsteps and scraping chairs filled the room, and he felt Wolfie appear next to him, her body resting gently against his leg. 

“Wolfie, get your harness,” Jeremy told her. He didn’t let her wear her harness or handle set inside the classroom, just because he didn’t trust the little shits he taught to not fuck with her. He heard her nails click against the tile, then a dragging sound as she returned to his side. When he didn’t hear any more rustling, he guessed that the class had left, so he leaned down and held his hand out for his handle. Since Michael wouldn’t be there to pick him up for another hour and a half and he didn’t have any work to do for the day, Jeremy decided that he could just take Wolfie outside and go for a walk. 

The two walked out of the classroom, Jeremy’s bag over one shoulder, and out into the hallway. Kids’ voices filled the hall, bouncing off of the walls and filling Jeremy’s head. It gave him a headache, but Wolfie did her best to scurry down the hall, threading her way through students so that Jeremy wouldn’t get trampled. 

In general, the kids at Middle Borough High were relatively understanding of Jeremy’s condition. Only a handful of kids actively made fun of him for it, but Jeremy really couldn’t care less. He was twenty-four, an _adult_ , and the opinions of some disgusting, smelly teenagers didn’t bother him in the least. Jeremy had a TA for every class, students of high standing that would tell Jeremy in a heartbeat if something wasn’t right.

Wolfie stopped walking, and so did Jeremy. He reached out his hand for the door, finding the handle and shoving it open. They walked out together into the hot afternoon, and Wolfie was already starting to pant. 

Jeremy smiled to himself and asked Wolfie if she wanted to walk, and her moving forward held his answer. 

——— 

Michael spotted Jeremy sitting on a bench by the carpool line, which was empty by then. He pulled up to the curb and put the car in park, honking once to let Jeremy know he was there. 

He got out of the car and moved to help Jeremy and Wolfie in, smiling softly. “My two favorites,” Michael commented in a sweet voice, grabbing Jeremy’s arm and pulling him up to his feet. “My favorite,” Jeremy returned, puckering his lips expectantly. Michael chuckled and leaned down to kiss him, then grabbed Wolfie’s harness and Jeremy’s hand. He put them both in the car, then got in himself. “I was thinking about going out to dinner,” Michael told Jeremy as he buckled himself in, and Jeremy hummed. 

“Where? We just ate out yesterday,” he noted, and Michael put the car in drive. 

“Yeah, well, I meant a nice restaurant, or whatever you consider _Inbetween_ to be,” Michael explained as they left the school, and Jeremy nodded his agreement. “Sure. Do they call it _Inbetween_ because the food isn’t great but it isn’t inedible or what?” he joked, and Michael rolled his eyes. “Shut up.”

———

Michael looked up at Jeremy, who had the menu in his hand and was studying it hard. Like, _really_ hard. He gave Jeremy a weird look, then shifted his view to his own menu. When he looked back up again, Jeremy’s face was literally in the menu. “What are you doing, weirdo?” Michael inquired breathlessly, laughing to himself. 

Jeremy slapped the menu onto the table, causing the salt and pepper to shake. “I’m reading the _menu_ , asshole, screw off!” he hissed, but Michael saw the smile he was trying to hide. “If you’re gonna wine and dine me, at least let me live my blind life in peace.”

”You’re right, I _am_ wining and dining you,” Michael admitted, looking back down at his menu. “I’m super horny because I haven’t had sex for, like, four days.” Jeremy snorted and crossed his arms, leaning forward. He looked in Michael’s general direction with a smirk on his face, eyes kissed. “Who says I wanna have sex with you tonight?”

Michael frowned at Jeremy, pouting. “You don’t mean that,” he murmured. “Why not?” 

Jeremy hummed thoughtfully, then returned his attention to his menu. It just looked like a white blob. “Kidding. Hey, by the way, I’m getting pancakes. You can’t do anything about it.” Michael shrugged and closed his menu, looking around for the waiter.

“Fine, but I don’t have cash and you know they don’t take card, so you’re paying.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this story? no plot progression?? pointless filler??? more likely than you may think 
> 
> ++ disregard the fucked up plot line okay when jere took the squip in 11th grade, his sight was like fixed af, but the squip still blocked michael from his vision. except this time, when jeremy saw michael in the hallway, he knew that he had to deactivate the squip (aka he didn’t take the upgrade)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao this chapter made me laugh sorry maddie :,))
> 
> gay shit marked w *** so y’all know how awkward sex is between these two nerds like they sure gotta love each other a lot

“Those pancakes didn’t settle well,” Jeremy complained as they pulled into the parking lot of their apartment complex. Michael really tried not to say “I told you so,” but it was second nature and just happened to fall out of his mouth. “I told you so.” 

Jeremy pouted and held his stomach, staring blankly at the windshield. “You’re mean. I’m not having sex with you,” he whined, smirking as he snaked his hand over the center console and “tried to hold Michael’s hand,” but ended up grabbing his crotch instead. Michael choked and almost ran into another car, glaring at his boyfriend. “You little fuck,” he hissed, slamming on the brakes. Jeremy fell into peals of laughter as he took his hand back, setting it innocently in his lap. “You’re mean,” he chuckled, and Michael looked around for a spot to park in. 

“You’re getting it tonight.” 

Jeremy hummed doubtfully, crossing his arms. “Just said I didn’t wanna have sex with you,” he repeated, clicking his tongue. “You’re too mean.” 

Michael rolled his eyes and pulled into a spot, throwing the car into park and practically ripping his seatbelt off. “Am not. All I said was that I told you not to get pancakes because they’d hurt your stomach,” he muttered, opening his door and closing it behind him, rounding the car to help Jeremy and Wolfie out. Jeremy pursed his lips and shook his head. “No,” he said slowly, loving how easy it was to piss Michael off. “No, I told you that I was getting pancakes and that you couldn’t stop me.” 

With a sexually frustrated huff, Michael held Jeremy’s hands, pulling him out of the car and steadying him while opening Wolfie’s door and letting her jump out. “Right, that makes it all better.” 

“Really?” 

“No. Still fucking you.” 

Jeremy swallowed hard. They had been dating for nearly eight years, but Michael could still manage to turn him on with just a few words. “Fucking me?” he asked playfully, letting Michael lead him into the lobby of the apartment. Michael nodded and smiled at a passing resident who waved at him. “Into the mattress,” he replied under his breath, roughly. “You’ll be screaming so loud the whole floor will hear you.” 

“That’s a hate crime,” Jeremy giggled nervously, and Michael’s grip on his hand tightened. He took a breath as he pressed the elevator button several times, impatient. “Then fine me, because I’m gonna tear you apart,” he promised, kissing Jeremy’s cheek. 

Jeremy felt himself shudder at the thought. They definitely had a very healthy sex life, full of both kinky and vanilla shit, but Jeremy would never get used to or tired of having sex with Michael. He was just so unpredictable and demanding and hot and sexually intelligent. It was mesmerizing. The elevator dinged quietly, sliding open and letting off a few people. Michael quickly pulled Jeremy and Wolfie in, glad that they were the only ones in the small space. 

“What’re we gonna do tonight?” Jeremy asked softly, running his thumb along the side of Michael’s hand. Michael hummed thoughtfully, looking down at Jeremy with shaded eyed. 

God, he was so pretty. 

“Well, since you can’t behave and like blaming me for things that aren’t even my fault, I was thinking... Actually, I don’t know what I was thinking,” Michael mused, looking down at Wolfie. Jeremy’s breath hitched in his throat as he tried to think of something new or interesting. Their collective list of kinks and fetishes was pretty extensive, but they usually tried to work most of them into each time they had sex. Both of them were really keen on experimentation, meaning that they’d try almost anything at least once. 

Almost anything. 

Jeremy rocked back on his heels, biting the inside of his cheek. “Rough or gentle?” he peeped, and Michael chuckled darkly. “Bad boys don’t get gentle sex, Jere,” he commented, and the elevator stopped to let them off at their floor. Michael pulled at Jeremy’s hand, but Jeremy hesitated. 

“C’mon,” Michael prompted him, and Jeremy reluctantly complied. Michael was bossy and usually knew what he wanted, but if Jeremy ever told him to stop or used their safe word system, he’d stop where he was at and change course immediately. He loved that about Michael. When they had first started having sex, it was always very vanilla, just because Jeremy never really watched porn and couldn’t tell what he was into. Plus, Michael was too nervous about asking Jeremy if he could try something out, especially because of Jeremy’s condition. However, eight years changes a couple, and now they were completely content and trusting in each other. 

The three walked down the hall until they reached their door, and Michael pulled his set of keys out of his back pocket, fumbling with the lock. He paused before opening the door. “In all seriousness, are you okay with sex tonight?” Michael asked quietly, to which Jeremy nodded frantically. “You can’t get me all worked up and then leave me like that,” he protested, and Michael chuckled breathily. 

He opened the door and let Wolfie patter inside, giving her a chance to vacate the room before Michael fucked Jeremy senseless, wherever that may be. After a few seconds, Michael pulled Jeremy into the room with a little bit of force, surprising Jeremy and making him trip over his own feet. 

Michael closed the door behind them, then grabbed Jeremy by the collar of his shirt, pulling him up to crash their lips together. Jeremy moaned quietly against Michael, running his hands up Michael’s torso and around his neck slowly as Michael moved them from the living room to their bedroom, careful not to let Jeremy fall or bump into anything. 

However, his caution didn’t interfere with the rough kissing between him and Jeremy. 

At the door, Michael kicked his shoes off, never letting his lips leave Jeremy’s. He took Jeremy’s bottom lip between his teeth, nibbling softly and then tugging before pushing Jeremy back onto their bed. He came up for a breath, gazing down at Jeremy with a huge grin. “I love you so much,” Michael breathed, moving his hands from Jeremy’s collar to the buttons holding the shirt together. 

“Show me, then,” Jeremy urged, pulling Michael closer to him. In a swift movement, Michael unbuttoned all of the buttons on Jeremy’s button-down, slipping it off and then kissing Jeremy again. He pulled the undershirt over Jeremy’s head, dully noting Jeremy’s unwavering grip on his own shirt. 

The room was filled with soft pants and an air of anticipation as Michael finished undressing Jeremy down to his boxers, then moved away to undress himself. 

“Where’d you go?” Jeremy asked in feigned confusion, knowing for a fact that Michael was just trying to get undressed a few feet away from him. With a small chuckle, Michael finished getting undressed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose before connecting his lips with Jeremy’s again. He moved them further onto the bed, pressing more urgent kisses along Jeremy’s jaw and neck before holding down Jeremy’s hips with intentional force. 

“Can’t believe you,” Michael huffed, smiling because dirty-talk was never his forte. However, it turned Jeremy on, and even though Jeremy was just a huge horndog, it meant a lot to him to know that someone thought he was doing a good job. “You were such a brat in the car, baby. First, you got mad at me for no reason. Told me what to do. That, uh, stuff. Then, you tried to turn me on while we were driving. We were in the parking lot. Couldn’t wait a few more minutes before touching me, could you?” 

Jeremy smiled to himself, heart fluttering and hips aching. He moved his hands to Michael’s hands, then up his arms to rest on his elbows. He hummed in response, but Michael shook his hands off and scowled. “That’s not an answer.” 

“No.” 

“No what?” Michael growled, digging his thumbs into Jeremy’s hipbones painfully. Jeremy yelped in surprise, squirming. “N-No, I couldn’t wait,” he quickly corrected himself. “Needed you.” 

With a satisfied smirk, Michael loosened his grip on Jeremy. “Needed me? You’re a desperate little slut, aren’t you?” he teased lightly, his tone and words going straight to Jeremy’s dick. “Y-Your slut, maybe,” he murmured, breathing picking up. Jeremy tried to readjust, but Michael pinned him against the mattress again. “My slut? That doesn’t make sense,” Michael laughed, but then returned to his previous attitude. “Yeah, I mean. My slut. Trying to get off in the car...” He really didn’t know what he was saying. 

Jeremy whimpered quietly and went to grab Michael again, but Michael pushed his hands away. “Don’t touch me. I’ll be back.” With that, Michael left the bed and walked to the closet, taking down his shoebox of sex toys that he and Jeremy used on occasion. He grabbed a blindfold, which was something he had never used on Jeremy before, just on himself. 

“Micah,” Jeremy called from the bed, and Michael stood on his toes to put the box back, then returned to the bed, moving Jeremy against the headboard and positioning himself between his legs. “Hold still.” 

Michael brought the blindfold to Jeremy’s face, tying it tightly and moving it so that Jeremy couldn’t see any light or color. “What’s the point of that?” Jeremy laughed, shaking with each breath of air. God, Michael was cute. Michael pouted and placed his hands on Jeremy’s thighs, tracing small circles with his thumbs. “You look hot with it on,” Michael countered, then quickly corrected himself, “I mean, you look hot either way, but now you _really_ can’t see me.”

Jeremy giggled again, searching the mattress and the area in front of him for Michael’s body before he realized that he wasn’t supposed to touch him. 

“Whatever gets you off, weirdo,” Jeremy breathed, and Michael lifted his chin and leaned down to kiss him harshly before running his hands down Jeremy’s sides and hooking his thumbs into the waistband of his boxers. “What do you want, baby boy?” Michael whispered against Jeremy’s neck, causing Jeremy to shudder under his touch. Thoughtfully, Jeremy bit his tongue, then opened his mouth to say something. Nothing came out. Was he embarrassed? 

“Baby, tell me. Can’t really have sex if you don’t tell me what you want,” Michael persisted, toying with the elastic. Jeremy swallowed hard and sighed. “Wanna suck you off,” Jeremy suggested, the fabric of the blindfold brushing against his eyelashes. “I wanna make you feel good.” 

Michael inhaled sharply and nodded slowly. The last time Jeremy tried blowing him, he choked because he forgot how big Michael was, which killed the mood and made Jeremy lose his voice for the rest of the day. 

“You’re sure?” Michael asked, and Jeremy nodded, mouth falling open slightly. “Th-Then, I want you to fuck me. Rough, just like, uh, just like you said. Into the mattress. Wanna scream so loud the entire fucking _building_ hears me,” Jeremy illustrated, his heart beating loudly against his chest. Michael blinked slowly, liking the sound of that, and then planted a kiss against Jeremy’s ear before helping him trade spots with him. 

***

Michael shook as he took Jeremy’s hands in his own, leading them to his own hips and then drawing his hands back, leaving Jeremy’s. With a steadying breath, Jeremy stretched out his fingers, feeling the waistband of Michael’s boxers and rolling them back. He moved his open hand to Michael’s member, gripping it carefully before going down on him. 

However, Jeremy missed, instead stabbing himself in the eye with Michael’s dick and making both himself and Michael burst out laughing. “O-Oh my God,” he chuckled, bending his free arm and burying his face in the crook of his elbow. This is why he didn’t give Michael blowjobs. “It’s okay, baby,” Michael chuckled, bringing a hand to Jeremy’s hair. “Let me...” He wrapped his hand around Jeremy’s, which was still resting at the base of his cock, trembling. He brought Jeremy up and led him to the head of his member, not letting go of his hand until Jeremy’s lips came to rest at the tip. 

Jeremy tried to stop laughing at himself as he pressed his tongue against the tip of Michael’s dick, slowly letting his head drop a bit before coming back up. He needed to be slower this time, because he didn’t want to choke and kill the mood again like the last time he tried to give Michael a blowjob.

Michael fell to needy moans as he pushed Jeremy further down his cock, breathing heavily. “God,” he praised Jeremy, throwing his head back. “So go-od. Keep going. You’re so fucking p-pretty.” Jeremy hummed around Michael, bringing himself back up for air. “Pretty?” he breathed, trembling. “Tell me what I look like.” With that, he went back down on Michael, and Michael’s grip on his hair tightened. 

“So, so gorgeous,” Michael gushed breathlessly, getting close. His hips bucked involuntarily. For being legally blind, Jeremy was really fucking good at giving head, even if it usually ended with choking or awkward dick-to-eye action. “I’m... Your hair is falling into your face, bouncing every time you come back up. Your lips looks s-so, so pretty, stretched and pink and – _fuck_. I, uh, your face is flushed. You’re... You’re blushing. Your blindfold is, God,” he moaned loudly, suddenly slamming his eyes shut. “Jeremy.” 

With that, he came, and Jeremy, a sputtering mess, tried to swallow whatever he could. He wished that Michael had given him a bit more of a warning, so he did the best he could as Michael finished. 

When Michael was done, he pulled Jeremy up gently, kissing his lips (which were definitely coated with his semen, but that was fine with him). Jeremy thought that maybe Michael would go a bit easy on him, hoping that the kiss was some promise of what was to come. However, Michael shoved him roughly against the mattress, disposing of his boxers and his own before grinding against Jeremy without warning. 

“ _Fuck_ , Michael,” Jeremy hissed, fingers digging into the mattress. He didn’t really like the blindfold, but if Michael did, he’d shut his mouth and let Michael do whatever he wanted to him, especially if it meant naked cuddling afterwards. 

“Won’t try to get me to fuck you in the car anymore, will you?” Michael asked gruffly, grabbing lube from the side of the bed and running a hand over his limp member, which was already hardening again just from seeing Jeremy laid out like that. Jeremy swallowed hard, gasping as apparently Michael decided to not even stretch him out. God, was he in pain. “Michael!” he screamed, hands bolting to grab at Michael. With a smirk, Michael eased in, moving down to Jeremy’s ear. “Hush baby, someone’s gonna hear you,” he warned in a whisper, but Michael didn’t let up. 

Whimpering and writhing in overwhelming discomfort, Jeremy dug his fingernails into Michael’s neck. Every time they had sex, Jeremy wished to himself that he could see Michael. He just wanted to see how good he made Michael feel, because talking about it just wasn’t the same. “M-Michael,” he pleaded, trying to push against his boyfriend for some more friction. 

Michael pulled out and pushed back in carefully, making sure that Jeremy could handle it before pulling back out one more time and then slamming into Jeremy. Jeremy yelled desperately and started shaking, mouth wide and jaw locked in place. 

“Fuck, Jere,” Michael hissed, thrusting back into Jeremy with newfound force. “You feel so good.” Jeremy moaned loudly and scratched Michael’s nape, panting loudly. “Y- _You_ feel so good. So good to me, Micah. God, d-don’t stop,” Jeremy begged, hips bucking. He _needed_ Michael.  

Michael’s pace never slowed, though he did readjust a few times to try and find Jeremy’s prostate. Jeremy’s needy scream sounded around Michael when he did, causing Michael to falter slightly. “I draw the prettiest noises from your mouth, baby boy,” he groaned, sitting back up and taking Jeremy’s cock into his hand, stroking it hard in time with his thrusts. “Wish you could see me. I’m so hard for you, Jere. God, again. You’re gonna make me cum twice in a night, baby. So, so pretty. You feel so good.” 

With that (and the help of all the stimulation), Jeremy finished against his chest and Michael’s hand, back arching slightly. Michael swallowed hard, so close to cumming again. He pulled out and stroked himself quickly over Jeremy, finishing on his chest. He loved seeing Jeremy like that, and Jeremy loved the feeling of Michael’s nut on his hot skin. They were a little weird, but it worked. 

***

A panting, tired mess, Michael leaned over Jeremy, face inches above his boyfriend’s. He took off the blindfold and twisted it between his fingers, then leaned down to kiss Jeremy before moving off of him. 

They’d probably be getting another noise complaint the next morning. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don’t say this enough, but maddie is literally everything. theyre the reason this fic is happening and stays maybe entertaining they’re always emailing me ideas i love them ahhh


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes (***)
> 
> also i’ll give this a 2+ week time hop from the last chapter if that’s okay!!
> 
> also it’s 3 am

“Don’t go! Please don’t! I don’t want you to go!” 

Michael tried to pry Jeremy’s hands off of him as he walked down Jeremy’s dad’s driveway, sighing and grabbing Jeremy’s arms so that he could turn around without making Jeremy fall over. “Jere, do you still want to be able to afford the boxes and boxes of those smiley-face gummies you eat every damn day?” 

Jeremy frowned and nodded. 

“You like being able to have a dog and drink _Dr. Pepper_?” 

He nodded again, defeated. 

Michael huffed triumphantly, kissing Jeremy softly. “Then I have to,” he insisted, but Jeremy still pouted nevertheless. “But–“ Michael held up a finger to Jeremy’s mouth, hushing him. “This is the last push we need. We’re so close to affording the vitrectomy.” 

“Vasectomy?” 

Michael shoved Jeremy playfully, making sure he didn’t fall. “You know what I mean,” he teased, holding Jeremy by the waist. “Look, if you’re good, I’ll call you tonight. If you know what _I_ mean. Hey, don’t give me that sad look.” Jeremy did look very sad. “Cheer up. It’s just a few days. 

Michael’s job was very unpredictable; he did a lot of traveling as a professional piano player, and he really didn’t know what exactly it was that he even did for a living. He played at weddings and churches sometimes, but he also filled in for bands and played for shows out of town sometimes. This time, he was playing for an off-Broadway production of _Phantom of the Opera_ , much to Jeremy’s dismay. First of all, he hated that musical. Secondly, New York was just so far away. Not really, but really, to him, it was. 

“Fine,” Jeremy said finally, bottom lip quivering. Michael smiled and kissed Jeremy again, holding him closer. “Jere, we’re so close to getting your eyesight back, baby. You know that? We’re so close.” 

Jeremy bit the inside of his cheek, but nodded anyways. He’d never admit it to Michael, but the possibility of getting his eyesight back made him more anxious than anything. He had been blind since he was seven, even though he could see a bit during his SQUIP phase, but it scared him even then. Even for the few short days he had it activated. “Yeah,” he replied breathlessly, chuckling. He missed seeing Michael. He wanted to be able to take in the beauty of the world around him and fully appreciate everything. 

However, what if he hyped things up? 

His dad walked down the driveway to join the couple by the car, putting a hand on Jeremy’s shoulder. “Saying goodbye? You cry every time, Scout,” he boomed, and Michael chuckled. He opened his car door and slid into the seat, then pulled it shut. He rolled down the window and reached out for Jeremy’s hand, taking it and pulling him toward the car. 

Their lips met momentarily as Mr. Heere awkwardly averted his eyes, not sure where to look. Michael pulled back and let his thumb run over Jeremy’s ear. 

“I love you. Call me!” Jeremy demanded, and Michael laughed quietly, buckling in. 

“Oh, I will. Love you too.” 

And with that, Michael turned on the car and drove away, leaving Jeremy with his dad until he would be getting back. 

———

Jeremy really hated spending time away from Michael, especially since he had built his entire life around the man. Literally, from the time they had met. 

Michael was Jeremy’s foundation, and without his foundation holding him and kissing him and promising that everything would be okay, things seemed pointless and a lot more terrifying than they should’ve. 

“Jere,” his dad’s voice cut across Jeremy’s anxiety-fueled thoughts, and he snapped a few times. Jeremy’s head shot up, his eyes blankly pointed in his dad’s direction. “Everything okay? You’re awfully quiet. Headache?” Jeremy shrugged and felt around the table for his water cup, finding it and bringing it steadily to his mouth. “Try heartbreak,” he pouted dramatically, taking a sip of water before setting the cup back down (somehow managing not to knock anything over). “I miss Michael!” 

Mr. Heere chuckled and shook his head at his son, who was too clingy for his own good. “You’re twenty-four, Jeremy. You’re a grown man. You can deal with your boyfriend being out of town for a few nights. Besides, you can _Face-chat_ or _Insta-time_!“ he cried, trying to encourage Jeremy and lift his low spirits. 

Jeremy just stared absently in his dad’s direction, making out the soft peach of his dad’s skin color and then the blue walls behind him. He really couldn’t see much else. “Yeah, well, it’s not the same. I don’t care how old I am, I’m allowed to be sad,” he countered like a toddler, moving to stand up. His dad followed suit, rounding the table to help Jeremy, but Jeremy shoved him away immaturely and reached sound for his stick. The stick he used to beat people when they got annoying, but also the stick that helped him not crash into shit. 

“No thanks,” he stopped his dad, locating the stick and feeling around for obstacles. “I’m fine. Goodnight.” With that, he stormed off to his old room, which really hadn’t changed too much since he left at eighteen. 

Mr. Heere looked after Jeremy, not moving to sit down until Jeremy was completely down the hallway and out of sight. 

“Just like his mother.”

———

Jeremy sat in his desk chair, swinging his legs back and forth as he held his phone in his hand. “Okay, _Google_ ,” Jeremy chimed, feeling “abnormally” horny and really just missing Michael. He needed to hear his voice. “Call Michael.” 

The phone chirped quietly, a small beeping sound playing once before an automated voice replied, “Okay. Calling Michael.” With that, the phone started ringing, and Michael picked up after the first ring. “Jeremy,” Michael cheered, exasperated. He must’ve been waiting for Jeremy to call. 

Jeremy smiled to himself, leaning back into the chair. 

“Micah, I miss you,” he cooed, biting his lip. He probably shouldn’t start masturbating yet. Michael snorted and groaned. “It’s been, like, six hours. You’re calling early, aren’t you?” he teased, and Jeremy huffed, agitated. “Maybe,” he admitted, and Michael laughed at him. 

“Why’re you calling? Just miss me?” 

Jeremy hummed softly, hand resting on the armrest. “Mayhaps.” Michael clicked his tongue and sighed to himself. “Mayhaps,” he echoed after a beat, voice changing slightly. Did it get deeper? “What do you miss about me, baby?” 

Oh, so they were starting already. 

With a hesitant breath, Jeremy let one of his hands absently wander down to his trousers, toying with the button. “Everything,” he gushed, chuckling airily. “I miss your voice. Your body. I miss you kissing me and holding me. I miss you.” Michael’s breathing filled the silence, soft and steady. 

“Everything? I wish I was there. Too bad I’m all the way in New York. All the things I’d do to you if I weren’t, Jere,” Michael urged, and Jeremy felt his penis suddenly become quite interested in the conversation. 

***

“Oh,” Jeremy squeaked, unbuttoning his pants. “What would you do to me if you _weren’t_ in New York?” Michael smirked at Jeremy’s eager spirit. Jeremy, his stupid little horndog. Always ready for “hot” phone sex. His voice crackled slightly over the phone, but Jeremy could still tell that it was his voice that he’d be getting off to, which was reassuring.

Michael’s voice and words were pretty much everything Michael had going for him to Jeremy. “Well,” Michael started unsurely, finding his footing. “I’m guessing that you’re sitting in your desk chair. I’d probably crawl between your legs and make you feel good.” 

“Make me f-feel good?” The zipper came undone. “How would you do that, Michael?” 

It took everything Michael had in him not to laugh at Jeremy’s desperate dialogue. If only he had Jeremy’s libido, which really had never changed since high school. He never did grow out of it. “I’d palm you through your pants until you begged me to blow you,” Michael predicted smoothly, and Jeremy’s hand was suddenly palming his member through his jeans, causing Jeremy’s head to fall back against the chair. “Mm, fuck, Michael,” Jeremy moaned quietly, taking note of the fact that his dad was in the same house. “P-Please... Need your mouth.” 

“Need my mouth to what?” 

Jeremy groaned in frustration, the palming not enough. He let his hand travel into his boxers, imagining that it was Michael’s instead of his own. It wasn’t too hard, especially since he couldn’t actually see anything. He loved making stupid blind jokes. “N-Need to fuck your mouth,” Jeremy moaned softly, taking his dick into his hand and starting to run his thumb over the tip of it. 

Jesus, the sounds he made for Michael were obscenely delicious. Michael wished he was there to see Jeremy. “You sound so good, baby. What’re you doing?” Michael asked curiously, probably starting to get a boner. Jeremy could care less. “Wh-What you would do. Just masturbatin’ to the sound of my boyfriend’s voice and imagining it’s him giving me a handjob, since I don’t feel like getting surgery to remove two ribs,” Jeremy joked, trying to lighten the hot mood. It didn’t work all that well, because he was starting to build up a rhythm. 

Michael mumbled something under his breath, then hummed to himself. “If I were there, I’d treat you so good, Jere. I‘d make you feel so fucking good,” he promised, and Jeremy’s voice cracked as he sped up. 

“Send a picture of your dick, Micah,” Jeremy joked breathlessly, moaning again. “Oh God, Michael.” Michael chuckled quietly. “What is it, baby? Wanna cum?” 

Jeremy moaned even louder, forgetting that his dad was probably right down the hall. “Y-Yeah, God,” he stuttered, waiting for Michael to say something – anything – to help him finish. If he had been quiet, he probably would’ve heard his dad open the door after knocking several times, apparently not getting the memo that Jeremy was having phone sex with Michael.

Unfortunately.

***

“Jeremy!” Mr. Heere croaked, his face probably bright red and mortified upon seeing his son. Jeremy almost choked, quickly throwing his body over his lower half and wedging the phone between his ear and shoulder. “D-Dad!” he screamed, too embarrassed to be twenty-four. “Fuck, out! God! Are you deaf? I thought that I was the only person in this house with a serious sensory deprivation issue! Jesus Christ! Get out! Are you still here?” 

No reply. 

Okay, fucking mood kill. Michael couldn’t stop laughing, losing it over Jeremy’s mishap. “Asshole!” Jeremy screamed into the phone, trying not to laugh himself. “Hang up!” 

Michael kept laughing. 

“Okay _Google_ , end call!” The line went silent, and Jeremy groaned as he realized that he’d need to finish sooner rather than later. 

God, he needed this surgery more than he had thought. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can’t stop writing about awkward shit happening to jere ahh also this is a time jump chapter!! probably like 2+ weeks after the last chapter (I’ll put this in the opening notes too if anyone reads those) 
> 
> this fic was really just a great idea and I’m sad that I’m butchering it!! really just for fun at this point, won’t be super long for once!!


	6. Chapter 6

Michael hated being away from Jeremy just as much as Jeremy hated being away from Michael. 

The biggest problem for him was the uncontrollable anxiety that crippled him while he was away, uneasiness and concern polluting his mind. Michael constantly worried that Jeremy would get hurt or lost or possibly die because he wasn’t there to make sure he was safe. Sure, Jeremy had Wolfie and his dad, but neither of them had the same bond and concern for Jere. 

Ever since they were in kindergarten, Michael and Jeremy had practically been attached at the hip. Even before Jeremy got into that car accident, Michael would’ve laid his life down for his friend. The two had been, and still were, inseparable. Separation meant worry, worry meant anxiety, and anxiety meant phone calls at four in the morning confirming the others’ well-being through quiet humming and half-conscious mumbling. 

When Michael finally got to start his trip back to New Jersey, he was absolutely overjoyed. His concern for the speed limit was nonexistent, though he knew better than to go twenty over. Steadying the wheel and moving over to an emptier lane, Michael glanced at his phone, opening it and calling Jeremy after turning on the speakerphone. As expected of any worried boyfriend, Jeremy picked up immediately. 

“Michael,” came Jeremy’s staticky voice, crackling as Michael zoomed down the highway. He smiled to himself because of how relieved Jeremy sounded, but turned his attention back to the road. 

“Hey, I’m on my way,” he replied loudly, tapping his finger against the steering wheel. “Is everything okay?” Jeremy sneezed on the other end of the line, causing the car to vibrate slightly and spook Michael. “Sorry, allergies. And yeah, I’m fine. I’m eating _Captain Crunch_ ,” Jeremy announced, followed by a loud crunching noise that disgusted Michael greatly. “God, stop it,” he cried, putting a hand to his ear. “Oh my God, quit. You’re intolerable.” 

“You’re mean.”

Michael chuckled and brought his hand back to the wheel, looking up at an exit sign to make sure that he wouldn’t miss his. “Sometimes. Do you need anything on the way back?” he asked, clearing his throat, which was dry from days of lack of use. Jeremy hummed to himself, took another bite, then yawned. “Yeah, don’t die. Also, I think we need milk, but I don’t know,” he joked, and Michael rolled his eyes. 

“Just because you’re blind doesn’t mean that you get to use cutesy tricks on me. We have milk, but I think I’ll get chocolate milk on the way. When does school let out?” Michael cooed, swearing under his breath as he watched a motorcycle weave its way through traffic. 

Jeremy chuckled to himself, and Michael heard the metal of what was probably a spoon clink against Jeremy’s cereal bowl. “I don’t know, I think this is the last day. I took today off because I feel like shit, so... Yeah. Well, I still have to go in next week apparently to like do grades or whatever, but I’ve already put all my grades in, so I’ll just call in and tell them that,” he responded, and Michael could hear the smile through Jeremy’s voice. 

Michael nodded to himself, arching his aching back. “Sounds good. I have an engagement party to play at tomorrow, but you can come to that. What kind of cake do you want for your birthday?” 

Although Jeremy could care less about birthdays and other holidays of the sort, the prospect of cake suddenly held his interest. “‘Erman c’oc’late,” he squeaked through a full mouth of _Captain Crunch_. “Oh mah’ goh’, mah mouf waters ‘ust ‘inking abou’ it.” Michael laughed and moved over two lanes to exit. “Alright, sounds good. I have a really great gift for you, though, so you can’t fill up on cake.” 

That came out wrong.

”What’s that supposed to mean?” Jeremy teased after swallowing. “Should I save room for–“

”Okay I have to go,” Michael interjected hotly, biting the inside of his cheek. “Love you, Jere. See you shortly.” Jeremy snickered at him, sighing happily. “God, I love you too.” 

Michael would try as well as he could to keep his “big present” a secret from Jeremy, but he had pretty much given himself away when he said that this was the last big push for that surgery. To his delight, Michael’s paycheck had been a big larger than he had originally expected, and as he hung up on Jeremy, he grinned widely at the road ahead. 

It warmed his heart to think that after almost eighteen years, Jeremy might actually be able to see again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this chapter was short, but this fic isn’t gonna be that long anyways - i have other projects!! love you all w the biggest heart energy


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> little note, there’s a little scene about the car accident jere was in, and it’s a little graphic, but not really

Jeremy opted to stay at home when Michael said that he had to go to the grocery store, much to Michael’s delight. He knew that Jeremy hated trips to _Walmart_ , and that’s why he said that that was where he was going. 

Full disclosure, that wasn’t where he was going. 

Leaving Jeremy at home with Wolfie, Michael drove through the city in search of a jewelry store, unbeknownst to his boyfriend, of course. He had never needed to buy any kind of jewelry before, so Michael didn’t exactly know where to go. However, he followed his instincts (and love of catchy jingles) and drove to _Kay Jewelers_. 

He finally located the store, pulling into a small parking space on the side of the road before getting out of his car and nervously shuffling into the building. With a shaky sigh, he pulled open the glass door, flinching at the quiet ringing noise above him. He was already so on edge, nervous because he had no idea what he was doing or what he was looking for.

This was going to be awful. 

———

Jeremy sat at home, listening to a podcast while he pet Wolfie. He didn’t have much to do when Michael wasn’t around, but he hated Walmart and had refused to go with him. 

Probably for the best, especially since he was tired anyways. 

The podcast was talking about some sort of celebrity doing something or one country threatening another, just because Jeremy liked listening to NPR on occasion. Usually, he’d ask Michael to turn on a _Dungeons and Dragons_ podcast before he left, but he wasn’t feeling it that day. It was raining outside, which made Jeremy feel even more tired, so listening to news, petting his dog, and enjoying the soft hum of rain tapping against the window really put him in a trance. 

With a sigh, he pushed himself further back into the couch cushion, feeling the fabric underneath him. Soon, he’d actually be able to _see_ the couch. _See_ Wolfie. 

See Michael. 

Jeremy smiled to himself at the thought of getting to see Michael. Even though there was, like, an eighteen percent chance that the vitrectomy wouldn’t even work, Jeremy was ridiculously hopeful and giddy. Even if the surgery meant that his vision would improve just a little bit, it’d be completely worth it. Any risks, any complications that could occur, they’d be absolutely worth risking in the end. 

Just for a chance to see everything again. 

Jeremy was tired of having to rely on his other senses to get him through the day. He wanted to see Michael. He wanted to see his classes and his dog and their apartment and his dad and New Jersey and his cereal and everything. Colors weren’t enough, and he wished that he was completely blind rather than teased by all the blotches he saw. They were visual representations of what he could be seeing, which irritated him. 

However, Michael and him had been saving for the surgery ever since they had heard about it, and what was once a silly dream or some outlandish procedure was slowly becoming a reality for the couple. 

Happily, Jeremy sunk further into the couch, falling over onto the arm. It sent painful streaks down his spine, but Jeremy’s optimism overcame the physical pain as he focused on the prospect of the upcoming vitrectomy, a surgery that he and Michael had scheduled an appointment for in two weeks. 

It was going to be a long two weeks. 

———

The night before the surgery was an emotional one, with Jeremy starting to bask in the anxiety of an upcoming surgery and Michael freaking out because of how Jeremy could possibly react to being able to see again. 

What if he saw Michael and their apartment and everything about their lives and left him? Would Jeremy do that? 

No, he wouldn’t. Michael shook away the ridiculous thoughts and turned back over in the bed, facing Jeremy again. Neither of them could get any sleep, though they both pretending like they were. “Jere?” Michael whispered, breath hot against Jeremy’s neck. Jeremy hummed and opened his eyes, not seeing anything but letting Michael know that he was awake. 

“Huh?” Jeremy asked quietly, exhausted but too nervous to fall asleep. Michael moved his arm up to Jeremy’s waist, rubbing his thumb against the thin comforter covering his boyfriend. 

“Are you scared?” Michael returned reluctantly, eyes trying to adjust to the darkness and focus on Jeremy’s face. He knew that Jeremy was scared, terrified, but he talking to Jeremy always calmed him down when he was in a panic. Jeremy paused, not replying for a minute. “Yeah,” he finally responded, though breathless. He sighed quietly and shifted, pressing a leg against Michael’s. “I’m horrified.” 

Michael’s stomach turned over as he heard the anxiety in Jeremy’s voice, and he leaned over to kiss Jeremy’s forehead comfortingly. “Why? Jeremy, you get to _see_ tomorrow. And every other day after that. You don’t have to deal with not being able to experience life to its fullest anymore. No more car accident, no more walking stick thing,” he murmured, bringing his hand up to Jeremy’s face, cradling it. Jeremy frowned slightly, letting out a shaky breath. Michael was right, but he was still scared.

“What if it doesn’t work?” he asked quickly, voice barely above a whisper. “What if it makes my eyesight worse? What if I’m like this forever? What if I get into another accident and something even worse happens this time?”

Jeremy’s mind flashed back to the few days after he had turned seven, set in his mom’s _Camry_ before it was completely totaled in the accident. God, the accident. Jeremy remembered the sheer horror on his younger self’s face as the car in front of them had stopped suddenly, the way the metal tore loudly and the way the sound ripped at his ears as the windshield crashed, glass impaling his skin. The way his mother had shrieked and cried out in pain when her air bag inflated, though it’s not like it would’ve helped. He remembered the searing pain of his head crashing into the glovebox, followed by the force from the car in front of them crushing him between his seat and the ruined dashboard. 

With fast breaths, Jeremy snapped out of his recollection, sweaty and even more anxious than before. He hated thinking about the accident. His mom’s death. His mom’s funeral. The car, that damned car. 

“Jeremy, hey,” came Michael’s calm voice, and Jeremy felt Michael wipe away a tear that had apparently formed in the corner of his eye. “Dr. Peterson says that you have incredibly high chances of benefiting from this surgery, Jere. It can’t make your eyesight worse, and if there are complications, we’ll get them fixed.” 

“But the money...” 

Michael brought his thumb to the corner of Jeremy’s mouth, pressing slightly. “The money is nothing,” he assured Jeremy in a hushed voice. “I’d spend every penny if it meant getting you back to how you want to be. I love you, eyesight or not, but this surgery is going to change our lives.” He set his own worries and insecurities aside. “It’s going to change our lives.”

Jeremy let Michael’s words blanket him, soothing his worries slightly and putting his anxieties at rest. He exhaled slowly and let his eyes fall shut. “You’re right,” he sighed, shaking his head. “That’s... I was stupid. It’s gonna change our lives.” 

And it would, but the tired couple wouldn’t know that until Jeremy came out of surgery and fully recovered from the operation. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short bridge chapter?? short bridge chapter


	8. Chapter 8

Michael really did try to listen to the surgeon as he explained the procedure to him and Jeremy, but he was just way too excited. He was also incredibly nervous. Was there a word for that?

“You know we have to reattach the retina. We’ll put Mr. Heere under a local anesthetic, then we have to use a sort of super advanced microscope to see your eye and the retina. It sounds scary, but we have to create tiny incisions on the white part of your eye, then we’ll place specialized instruments in those incisions. We have to remove some of the vitreous gel as well, and that comes after the instruments are in place. We’ve decided that a silicone oil will be injected into your eyes to replace the vitreous gel. Given the severity and circumstances of your impairment, this whole thing should take two hours tops. Sound good? Any questions?” the doctor explained calmly, a clipboard in his hand as he took down Jeremy’s heart-rate, the time, and his blood pressure. 

Jeremy stared blankly at the wall ahead, not sure where to look because everything was white. The surgery honestly sounded terrifying, but if it meant that he could see even a bit better, then it was absolutely worth it. “Yeah,” he choked out, and he felt Michael’s grip tighten on his hand. Michael hadn’t let go of his hand since they had gotten there.

The surgeon looked up at Michael and smiled softly. “Your boyfriend’s surgery will yield wonderful results, if our projections are correct. The surgery shows improvement in about eighty-two percent of people who undergo it, and if we’re right, Mr. Heere should experience a full recovery, and his vision should be completely restored,” he assured him, pen tapping at the paper on his clipboard. “I know you two may be nervous, because that’s only to be expected. However, I assure you that there’s nothing to grieve over. He won’t feel anything, and he may experience some pain afterwards, but nothing too severe.” 

Michael let himself grimace inwardly. It was okay to be nervous, right? The doctor was making this whole thing seem like just another surgery, but to Jeremy and Michael, it was seriously so much more. 

“Oh, we should just go over a few things, post-surgery. We’ll talk about it again after Mr. Heere comes to it,” the surgeon continues absently, flipping a page over. “Let’s see... Okay, you need to take it easy for a week or so after. Don’t turn your head too quickly, don’t lay on your back, try to not move your head much for about two to four days post-surgery. We’ll keep you here for those days, just so that we can monitor your progress. Two to three weeks off of work, four if symptoms persist. You may experience severe headaches and migraines, plus eye pain.” 

The side effects rolled over Jeremy at a painstakingly slow rate, giving him ample time to worry over every single one. Silence spanned the time over the next few minutes until the surgeon got up and motioned for Michael to leave the room, since surgery would be starting within the next half-hour. Michael stood to his feet, legs shaking, and squeezed Jeremy’s shoulder with one hand, using the other to turn Jeremy’s head and kiss him. 

“It’s going to be okay,” Michael promised, voice wavering. “I love you. I’ll see you when you get out.” 

Jeremy moved his hand to Michael’s hand on his shoulder, then grinned nervously. “Yeah,” he replied weakly, and he felt Michael’s hand slip off of his shoulder, heard the soft clicking of Michael’s shoes as he followed the doctor out of the room. 

And he was alone. And he was scared to death.

And he was hopeful.

———

Michael sat in the waiting room of the hospital, clawing at his eyes after pushing his glasses up on top of his head. He groaned, voice getting caught in his throat, as he folded himself over his legs. He felt so nauseous he may as well have been one of the waiting patients.

Suddenly, Michael felt a tapping on his shoulder, and he looked up and to his right to see a small child leaning over the arm of her chair, propping herself up carefully. “Are you crying?” she squawked, and Michael looked around for the girl’s parents. They must’ve been up at the counter or in the bathroom or something. He looked back at her and sniffled, smiling to mask his nerves. It made him feel better, if that was any consolation.

“No, I’m not,” he replied softly, pulling his glasses down to his face. He loved kids. “What are you here for?”

The girl fell back into her seat, crossing her legs and toying with the end of her dress. “My mom says that something’s wrong with my brain. I can only see out of this eye,” she informed him, pointing to her right eye. Michael followed her finger sadly, guilt racking his chest. This kid could only see out of one eye, and Michael was scared that Jeremy’s corrective surgery wouldn’t work that well? She must’ve been five or so, and she didn’t even seem all that nervous.

“Are you scared?” Michael asked softly, and the girl grinned widely, shifting her legs and leaning forward. “Not really. My mom said I could get a cat if I’m good, so I’m not scared. If I get scared, at least I’ll have a cat to cuddle,” she responded happily, and a woman appeared at her side, a stack of papers wedged between her arm and his chest. 

“Sorry about Natalie,” the woman chuckled, rubbing her daughter’s shoulder consolingly. “She’ll talk your ear off if you give her the chance.” 

Michael snickered to himself and looked back down at Natalie, who was rubbing her nose. “Why are you here?” she asked him, then crossed her arms expectedly. “Your eyes seem fine. You have glasses.” Michael readjusted his glasses and shrugged, crossing his legs. 

“My boyfriend can’t see,” Michael explained cautiously, watching as the mother’s expression hardened. He was used to the uncomfortable shift in attitude when he said something about Jeremy being his boyfriend, so it didn’t bother him much. Natalie gasped and clambered to her knees, leaning over the side of her chair. “He can’t see at all? Why? Is he blind?”

Michael nodded slowly, biting the inside of his cheek thoughtfully. “Yeah, he is. Well, he can see, like, colors. It’s almost like when you press your hands into your eyes hard, and you see colors. Phosphenes,” he informed the girl, holding his hands up to his glasses in demonstration. “He was in an accident when he was seven.” Natalie stared up at him in awe, her eyes glimmering. 

“Amazing!” Natalie cried, but then corrected herself, “Wait, not amazing, sorry. I’m sorry that your friend got hurt.” 

“Boyfriend.” 

“Your friend that’s a boy?” she asked cluelessly, and her mom squeezed her shoulder pointedly. “I think you should let this man go back to what he was doing, Sweetie,” she interjected, shooting Michael an apologetic look. 

Michael shook his head and swallowed hard, honestly just glad for the distraction. He hated worrying about Jeremy. “It’s okay,” he muttered. “No, he’s my boyfriend. Like, we’re dating.” Natalie nodded understandably, sitting back in her seat. “Cool. Well, tell your boyfriend good luck! He’ll be happy to see you,” Natalie blushed, smiling. “My mom says that there are other ways to see the world, though, so I’m sure that he’s not as blind as you think he is.” 

A nurse called for Natalie and her mom to go to the back, leaving Michael and Natalie’s words behind in the waiting room. 

_My mom says that there are other ways to see the world._

Michael sat in a thoughtful silence, breathing softly and letting his anxious thoughts melt away. He wished that someone had told him something like that years before, because he probably wouldn’t be so worried if they had. 

_I’m sure he’s not as blind as you think he is._

———

Jeremy came to it in his hospital bed, monitor beeping regularly, his head fuzzy. He felt so numb and heavy, and he forgot where he was at temporarily. 

“Mr. Heere, how’re you feeling?” a soft voice asked, and a woman readjusted his IV bag. Jeremy’s response was a disgruntled groan, though he didn’t feel absolutely awful. He refused to open his eyes, mainly because he could sort of feel a bandage of sorts covering them. His body vibrated slightly as someone adjusted the settings on his hospital bed, and he heard a door open and close. 

Anxiety. 

Moments later, the door opened again, and he heard quick footsteps this time, then someone picked up his hand frantically and held it to their mouth, kissing the back of it gently. “Jeremy, it’s me,” came Michael’s voice, and Jeremy’s heart fluttered. 

“Michael?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two more chapters hNN  
> ++ thanks for the support! i feel bad for tainting the prompt that maddie came up with, but it was fun to learn about blindness


	9. Chapter 9

Jeremy was initially expecting some sort of huge reveal, like his eyes were opening after a long time of being closed. However, that didn’t happen, because he had these weird shield things that made him look like a fly covering up his eyes.

However, something was different.

His vision was really spotty, but he could actually make out shapes, not just colors. He could make out Michael’s face as he hovered over him nervously, bringing a finger up to Jeremy’s eye to brush against the plastic shield.

“Can you see anything?” Michael asked after a while, and Jeremy sniffled loudly. He suddenly felt very stuffy, like he was having bad allergies or something. “Uh, these little hole things, I guess. I think... I think it may have worked,” he replied in an undertone, though he sounded disappointed. Maybe things would be different the next day. 

The doctor opposite of Michael pressed a few buttons on Jeremy’s heart monitor and looked back to Michael with a huge grin. “Good news is that we were able to reattach the retina. Our long-term oil injection should last him quite a long time, which is good news. He’s doing a lot better than some of our patients, and judging by that, he may not even need to stay the night!” Michael laid a hand over Jeremy’s, gazing up at the doctor. 

“Really?” he choked back happy tears, and the doctor nodded, satisfied. “Absolutely. The surgery seems like it did its job, though we won’t know until Mr. Heere is able to take off those ventilated shields. That should only be a few more hours, by the way. I recommend keeping them on until you go to bed tonight. 

“Another thing,” the surgeon added, picking up a clipboard from a hook above Jeremy’s bed. “You’ll have to come in for post-op tomorrow, and we’ll just see how your eye is healing. You’ll probably experience those allergies for a few more days, plus very leaky eyes. We recommend that you don’t eat any heavy foods for the next twenty-four hours as well. Don’t turn your head too quickly, stay hydrated, and we’ll be giving you a sort of foam platform to be sleeping on for the next few nights. Let me just check with the other doctors, get all of your insurance in line, and you should be good to go!” 

Michael sat, dumbfounded, mouth agape. “That’s it?” he repeated stupidly, giddy. Was it really that simple? Years of waiting, over a decade of Jeremy being legally blind, and the surgery was that easy? 

The doctor nodded and shuffled to the door, moving the clipboard from under one arm to the other. “Yes sir,” he responded with a smile, opening the door. “The nurse should be right with you. I hope to see you two tomorrow, and I hope that Mr. Heere can see me, too.” 

———

The ride home was a silent one, though it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was more a lack of talking simply because Michael and Jeremy were just in shock. Jeremy was slowly seeing more and more, the small holes in the eye shields displaying a lot more than colors and faint shapes. 

He could see _cars_ in front of them, he could see _traffic lights_. Jeremy’s appreciation for everyday things that people took for granted was mesmerizing. 

“I can’t wait to take these things off,” Jeremy finally said, letting a breath go. Michael chuckled airily and looked over at him with a grin. “You look like an oversized fly,” he laughed, and Jeremy looked over at him, able to make out his _eyes_ , his _mouth_ , his _nose_. And God, from what he saw, Michael was fucking gorgeous. “Don’t bully me,” he managed, tearing his gaze from Michael. He could actually see. 

He could actually see.

Michael hummed happily and pulled into the parking lot of their apartment complex, getting out of the car and rounding it to help Jeremy. Except that Jeremy didn’t really need help. 

“Can you see?” Michael asked breathlessly, holding onto Jeremy’s arm. Jeremy could see, though every time he thought that things were getting clearer, his eyes would tear up and his sinuses would act up. “It’s like I’m crying or something. How bad is the pollen?” he joked, blinking away the wetness in his eyes. God, it was becoming annoying, but the irritation he was experiencing was nothing in comparison to the overwhelming happiness and excitement that dictated his thoughts and movements. 

Michael smiled and looked back at the ground, then up at the building. He felt like they should’ve been happier, or at least more expressive of how happy they were, but it made sense that they were really putting all of their emotions into the moment when Jeremy got to take off his fly eyes. 

They rode the elevator to their floor, took Wolfie out for a walk, and then returned to their room to make a very late dinner. 

Jeremy was counting down the seconds until he could take off the eye protection, mainly because things were a lot harder to see and make out now that it was darker in the room. Michael insisted on keeping a single lamp lit, plus the television on as he cooked in the small kitchen. 

“I smell a cheese quesadilla with my name on it,” Jeremy called from the couch, petting Wolfie in his lap. Wolfie, his dog. Wolfie, who had soft, _golden fur_ and _huge_ floppy ears. Wolfie with _brown eyes_. Michael had described all of this to Jeremy before, but actually seeing his guide dog was a lot different than hearing about her. “It does have your name on it. I’m bringing it over,” Michael replied, and Jeremy could hear the smile in his voice. Both of them were secretly so happy, and neither of them bothered to mention the elephant in the room.

Well, not a literal elephant, but if there was an actual elephant in the room, Jeremy would actually be able to see it.

Michael carried two paper plates to the couch, falling back into the cushion next to Jeremy. “Thanks,” Jeremy muttered, holding his hand out for the plate. Wait, he could just take it now. Jeremy looked at Michael’s hand and took the plate from him, causing Wolfie to wake up and jump off of his lap. She padded to the kitchen, probably to vacuum up whatever mess Michael had made. 

“God, I want to take those off,” Michael grunted, biting the inside of his cheek as he watched Jeremy locate his dinner plate and pick it up with ease. 

They knew that they shouldn’t have, but they really couldn’t help it. 

Without a word, Michael and Jeremy set down their plates, and Jeremy closed his eyes tightly, wincing as the throbbing pain started up again, as Michael undid the medical tape adhering the plastic to his face. He hesitated before prying them off, letting both pieces fall to the floor without a sound. Michael quickly moved his hands over Jeremy’s eyes, and he noticed that they were trembling.

Jeremy brought his hands up to Michael’s arms, holding on tight. “Oh my God, I’m so nervous, what the fuck?” he choked out, letting himself giggle and breathe for a minute. Being able to actually see would be a huge shift, one of which he suddenly wasn’t sure if he was ready for or not. Michael’s whole body was shaking, and he swallowed hard as he looked at Jeremy longingly. He couldn’t imagine what it’d be like to actually be able to see after years and years of being blind, and he knew that the change would be huge. 

“It’s... Oh God, now I’m nervous,” Michael laughed, and the couple spent the next few seconds awkwardly chuckling together. “Okay, uh, on the count of three?” 

Jeremy nodded, grip tightening on Michael’s arms. “Yeah, okay.” 

Michael inhaled sharply and blew air at Jeremy’s face, his heart pounding against his chest. 

“One...”

Jeremy bit his bottom lip, eyes watering profusely. 

“Two...” 

Michael felt himself tearing up, his hands shaking even harder. God, they were a mess. Almost eighteen years of Jeremy not being able to see, and this was how they were unveiling his new vision? How like them. He wanted to cry, but there’d be plenty of sobbing when Jeremy could see everything again.

“Three.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? just wanting to end this fic?? maybe


	10. Chapter 10

What do people who’ve been blind for the majority of their life see? 

Maybe their circumstances in regaining their sight were a lot more romantic or impressionable, but in their apartment at ten at night, eating cheese quesadillas and watching some awful game show in the background, Jeremy wasn’t blind anymore. He wasn’t trying to make things out based on color and and movement. He didn’t wonder what Michael looked like or what their couch looked like or what shape the apartment was in. 

He could see all that. 

For about ten minutes of awed silence, Jeremy swept the room with his new eyes, blinking and glossy. The television. The door. The kitchen. The lamp. The coffee table. The cable box. The remote control. The coasters. The carpet. The tile. The oven. The microwave. The sink. The counters. The dishes. The cabinets. Another door. 

Michael couldn’t help but to stare at his boyfriend, wide-eyed and breathless. God, he had never looked so beautiful. Even in his state of congested sinuses and puffy eyes, Michael found Jeremy absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking. It was like he was having an epiphany of sorts, like he was seeing for the first time or something. Jeremy’s eyes weren’t foggy and shaded like they used to be, even though they were still pretty bloodshot and runny from the surgery. However, they were beautiful, and the last time Michael saw them like that was in their junior year of high school. 

Jeremy refused to look at Michael for the entirety of the ten minutes, convinced that if he did, he’d break down into tears and fuck up his eyesight somehow. He was careful not to move his head, but rather his body, since that’s what the doctor had told him to do. 

The simplest things held the most beauty. 

Michael’s hands never moved from Jeremy’s arms, and his eyes never left Jeremy’s face. He let silence ensue, at least until Jeremy closed his eyes and faced him again, then let them flutter open and fall on Michael’s face. 

“Holy fuck,” Jeremy breathed, voice not even a whisper. He started shaking hard, arms trembling in Michael’s grip as he brought his hands up to Michael’s face. He felt himself starting to actually tear up, eyes even wetter as he felt Michael’s face and _saw_ it too. No more guessing if Michael had ever grown into his skin or how he did his hair or if that scar from third grade had ever faded. Jeremy didn’t need to wonder what his boyfriend looked like and if he was as good-looking as he was caring and sentimental.

The answer was yes, by the way.

Jesus, Michael was _hot_. He was absolutely gorgeous, and Jeremy choked on a dry sob as he realized how lucky he was. His thumbs traveled along Michael’s jawline, which hooked softly around his ear and stretched to the other side of his face. He was the warmest color, which Jeremy sort of already knew because he used to only be able to see blobs of colors. His cheeks were a soft pink, as was his cute nose. Jeremy rubbed his thumb over the tip of his nose, pushing it up and giggling to himself. He rolled his fingers over Michael’s dark eyebrows, over his eyelids, stared at his deep brown eyes. 

Michael was stunning. 

Jeremy brought his hands up to Michael’s hair, brushing his fingers through the thick strands as he readjusted his legs so that he was kneeling against Michael’s crossed legs. Michael could only watch in amazement and adoration as Jeremy scanned his features, felt his face, probably making it oily as fuck, but Michael could care less. It was just so pure and heartwarming. 

Michael shifted slightly and felt the ring box in his pocket dig into his rear, causing him to wince inwardly. He had forgotten about it in the moment, though he had been thinking about the proposal ever since he bought it. He never had the right time or the right words to do it, and that moment wasn’t any different. However, Michael insisted on carrying it around just because maybe there would be some perfect moment to ask Jeremy. Would it be too cheesy to ask Jeremy then and there, just as he had regained full visionary capacity? Probably. 

As if he was experiencing an out-of-body experience, Michael’s arm moved from Jeremy’s to his back, reaching for his pocket. He was quaking. “Michael,” Jeremy hushed, thumbs at the corners of Michael’s mouth. “Fuck, you’re... Jesus, I–“ 

Michael took Jeremy’s hand off of his face and backed up a bit, hand closing around the box, still shaking. He clambered back and off of the couch, never taking his eyes off of Jeremy’s confused but amazed face. He slid to the floor to one knee, just like every cheesy proposal video he had ever seen, and let his arms rest against his leg, blinking hard. 

Jeremy’s hands flew to his mouth, and he stopped breathing. Fuck, was he seeing things? Well, yeah, he was, but what the fuck? 

“Jere, uh,” Michael tried, voice faltering. He cleared his throat and tried again, shaking his head. “This has probably been too long of a time coming, but, well, God, this is hard...” Jeremy chuckled breathlessly, wiping at his nose and letting the tears from his eyes pour down his face, leaving hot streaks as they fell to his lap. “G-God, you’re so fucking cliché,” he choked, and Michael giggled awkwardly. 

“Maybe. I, uh, I had this huge speech planned, but–“ 

Jeremy sniffled and nodded, causing the pain in his head to worsen. “Yes,” he managed, swallowing hard. “God, absolutely.” 

It took Michael a moment to process what was happening. Jeremy and him, ten at night, eating shitty cheese quesadillas, crying, a ring in his shaking hands as he propped the box open, watching Jeremy’s elated expression through glossy eyes.

Michael’s eyesight was never the best, but he could still see. However, in that moment, he wasn’t seeing with his eyes. Michael was seeing with every fiber of his being, like the universe was tugging at every cell in his body. He saw the future and the past, just not the present, and he could barely register Jeremy pulling him up and kissing him, square on the mouth, melting into the contact just like he always did. 

Except he could see. 

And for once, so could Michael.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alternative ending: jeremy pulls down his pants and yells “DAMN SON I STILL GOT IT”  
> okay seriously though,, sorry for the sudden ending,, but i’ve been thinking about a prequel kinda thing to this fic once i finish enjoy it before it melts?? lmao would anyone read that haha  
> but thanks so much to anyone who read this, bc it’s a mess and poorly written, but yep okay thanks again!!  
> all my love

**Author's Note:**

> aHH 
> 
> i wish i could record myself screaming and post it in this box bc that’s my internal feeling when writing this!! 
> 
> okay this prompt was given to me by my good friend maddie bc i’m unoriginal - they’re so amazing and creative and talented i’m blessed!! 
> 
> thanks for reading, and this is gonna be another multi-chapter fic bc i’m trash :)


End file.
